Please Don’t Be “That” Parent!

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Kids’ memories are being made right now. To ensure they’ll remember youth sports in a positive way … don’t be “that” parent.


Ah, summer vacation … a sacred time for students across America.

Courtesy: School over Sports – WordPress.com

It’s a time for kids to take a refreshing dip in a swimming pool, spend time with friends and family and, most importantly, take much needed time off from studies.

But it’s also the time when parents jam local ballparks to watch sons or daughters participate in T-ball, softball, baseball, and all sorts of other games.

That can turn into a relaxing night at the park or it can reveal truth in that old saying, “One bad apple spoils the whole bunch.” It takes just one parent to ruin the night for everybody.

How do they do it? Well, here are several ways a parent becomes “that” parent.

“Bryan Trenberth” Parents

The sitcom Everybody Loves Raymond soared in popularity over the years because it’s relatable to everyday life. One example is the episode entitled, “T-Ball.”

Ray’s daughter, Ally, plays on a T-Ball team and Ray and wife, Debra, are in charge of bringing snacks to one of Ally’s games. They brought pretzels to the ballpark.

What they don’t know–until it’s too late–is that the parent in charge of team snacks, Bryan Trenberth, wouldn’t let them serve pretzels. Pretzels aren’t on “The List of Approved Snacks” — a self-styled list created by Trenberth and documented on his clipboard.

Parents like Brian Trenberth suck the fun out the game. They’re way too formal. While it’s good to be organized, it’s a downer when organization goes too far.

Parents Who Cry

Courtesy: ChicagoNow

How many times have you had to suffer — listening to a parent or parents yell throughout a game?

You think to yourself: “Geez, put a sock in it!” But few people do that or have the courage to say it. So most of the time everybody spends the night in misery.

It’s fine for parents to encourage their kids and teams. But that’s different from whining constantly about calls and/or chattering about why their children aren’t getting more playing time.

In more reasonable moments most parents know that umps are doing the best they can and coaches have to balance many decisions over the course of a game.

It’s just that understanding and self-management don’t always go hand-in-hand — especially when it comes to your kids.

Parents Who Live Though Their Kids

We all know adults who weren’t the best athletes as youth. Now, as parents, they push their kids to be what they weren’t.

Courtesy: Getty Images and Greg Schwem

Some become their coach, which is a big mistake. Putting these parents in positions of authority is like giving an arsonist a lighter with a can of gas.

Coaches who live through their kids don’t put team success or player development as a priority. Their job is to make their kid(s) a star … or at least make their kid(s) look like a star.

These parents muddy the good name of ‘coach’– adults who have a lasting and positive impact on America’s youth.

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We sometimes forget the obvious: kids aren’t kids forever. So what will the kids of today recall ten or twenty years from now?

Will it be the thrill of competition? The friendships they made? Team chemistry and the thrill of winning together? Or will they remember … dad yelling … mom going after the ump … never measuring up … feeling like a failure.

Parents need to remember that now is the time childrens’ memories are made. To ensure that kids have a positive recollecation of youth sports later in life … don’t be “that” parent.

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Reach Cameron Brown at cameronbrown647@yahoo.com

About Cameron Brown

Cameron Brown is sports columnist with The Journal-Enterprise, Providence, Kentucky and winner of the Kentucky Press Association “Best Sports Column of the Year” award. Cameron has a passion for basketball–like so many others in his home state of Kentucky. He played basketball for his high school in rural western Kentucky and enjoys other sports, including college football and Major League Baseball. His dream is to have a job in sports.



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Comments (2)

    MARK C MORTHIER wrote (07/23/17 - 7:12:18PM)

    GREAT ARTICLE CAMERON. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK

    Heidi wrote (06/20/18 - 12:19:59PM)

    We have a parent who doesn’t socialize with any other parent on our team. Her child was bullying a teammate and when brought to her attention she refused to believe her kid would do any wrong. Since then, she has gone out of her way to get our coach fired, calling the president of the league and making stuff up about the coach saying that he was yelling at her kid to throw the ball to the pitcher… (psst… throw the ball! It’s softball!) She even went as far as to tell coach she was pulling her kid from the team, missed a game and showed up to the following game. When asked what was going on because coach thought she was pulling her child from the team, she tried to insist that he didn’t want her on his team. He told her calmly that she was more than welcome to play, but bullying would not be tolerated in any form. The mother cussed at him and took her child home. The husband of this mom then threatened coach saying he will get whats coming to him. When coach calls president of league, president of league does not want to believe this mother would act this way and tell coach that coach was in the wrong. Our whole team we have watched grow for four years may now be broken up because of this one mother and child. . .
    Just to add icing to the cake, the older sister of this girl is on the president’s senior league. 🙁